Confession: once I get a little alcohol in me, I start texting everyone.

It's usually a mass text disguised as a personal text. I HAVE to stop doing this. 

I think if I got cable TV this would solve the problem.

Wait-- is it a problem?

Lured a boy over only to be completely bored. Okay, to be fair, not completely bored. I mean, he did bring my friend Jack Daniels.

We try.

But how many times do you tangle with someone before you admit you don't have chemistry?

Mechanical. Awkward. Uninspiring. Little white lies and fake little noises.

Repeat repeat repeat.